Foster Care and Finances

All is well at my house. Christmas was pretty good, New Year Eve was peaceful and the kids have had three snow days in a row. That means that I don't have to do my crossing guard job in the polar freeze that is happening in Michigan right now. (Yeah me!) We had some bumpy patches during Christmas vacation but on the bizarre scale that I judge my life by nothing caused a great deal of upset. Nobody is in jail, everyone old enough has a job, and we spent some good family time together. That is all I can ask at this point. On one super positive note, my oldest son plowed the driveway everyday this week with his dump truck and his girl friend did the sidewalks. I didn't have to pick up a shovel until the end of the big snow. (Again with the yeah me!) January is usually the month where my mind focuses on the family finances because I am always digging out from the financial avalanche caused by Christmas and tax season is ahead. In my professional life, helping foster parents obtain financial assistance has become a surprising aspect of licensing.

I work with several families who are becoming licensed to be a kinship foster family. A kinship foster family occurs when a member of a family becomes the primary caregiver for another family member's children. Typically it is grandparents fostering their grandchildren, but it can be an aunt, uncle or cousin taking the children into their home.  A kinship foster family is eligible to receive foster care reimbursements from the State of Michigan as a regular foster family would. This is tremendously helpful for retired grandparents who are suddenly shouldering the financial burden that children bring when they may already be retired and out of the work force. These payments are intended to assist with food, housing, and clothing for the children and are an important part of the foster care system. Imagine having a ten year old suddenly move into your house. The child will immediately need clothing (because they rarely come with more than a few days worth of clothes) and school supplies right away. A ten year old is another mouth at the table and the grocery bill is going to go up. Add in doctor appointments and visitation with the birth parents and your gas bill has skyrocketed. A baby or a toddler is even more expensive with the necessities of diapers and formula. Finances for a foster family can get tight very quickly. Kinship families also need to go through the licensing process which can take up to six months. Once the license is official, reimbursements can begin and things get easier.  When my husband and I were exploring the idea of becoming foster parents, he was very concerned about the financial side of things. We were both willing to provide for a child who may return home but we did not have buckets of money sitting around waiting to be spent on a needy child. I was a stay at home mom and we were living on one income. An important piece of information that every foster parent needs to know is that will take up to six weeks for the flow of money from the State to get going. This information did not come up at any of the training sessions we attended and caused a lot of frustration.  Kinship families are looking at a much longer wait because of the licensing process.  This information would not have dampened my desire to become a foster parent, but it would have helped me plan better. So I am sharing it with you and underlining it so that you don't miss it.

My husband and I look at children very differently.  Once I have a child in my home and in my arms, money does not enter my head.  I think that when a child comes through our door that my husband can see dollar signs floating above the child's head.  The younger the child, the more dollar signs are there.  I am mocking my husband affectionately because his skill at budgeting enables us to share our home with children in need.  We had one little guy who was about 5 years old arrive on the Saturday of Memorial Day weekend.  He was an emergency placement because he was one of five siblings and there were no homes with enough beds available to accommodate the entire sibling group.  Many foster families were full or on vacation because of the holiday.  So the social worker quickly located three homes and split the group up until other arrangements could be made. This child arrived in a very dirty state with wet shoes and no clothing.  His shoes smelled so bad that I knew they needed to be thrown away.  Usually, I like to let a child feel more at home before we tackle the challenges of bathing.  However, this child needed a bath immediately and clean clothing to wear afterwords.  Luckily, I had some clothing that was close to his size and we made due. Here is another valuable tip, always have some extra clothing around in various sizes for an emergency. Sweat pants, t-shirts and pajamas are some of the best to keep on hand.  I did not have any shoes in his size so I sent my husband down to the store to purchase some.  The little guy left our home three days later in new shoes and with several changes of clothing that he was comfortable in.  This is not an unusual scenario in the foster care world and can create quite a financial drain on foster families.

Another issue that pops up from time to time in the newspaper are families who claim to be loving foster families when they are in fact a group home and just in the business to earn money.  These are people who take in more children than they can possibly care for.  We have all read these kinds of stories with over-sized families where a child is abused or neglected and the family is accused of just taking in children for the State money.  This really does happen and both the family and the agency that allows it are at fault.  The downside is that good foster families who just want to help a child are stereotyped into this category and it discourages new families from signing up to foster.  When I am training new families, I tell them that there is no way to make money from taking in foster children if you are doing it correctly.  A child has needs and the amount the State pays is just enough to cover those needs.

If you are thinking about becoming a foster parent, I recommend that you ask questions and do some research to learn about the financial impact on your family.  Visit the Department of Human Services website in your state to find out what the daily rate is for foster families.  Ask your licensing worker about day care costs, clothing allowances, and medical care.  A good agency will also be able to refer you to local programs where you can get gently used clothes and children's furniture at low cost or free.  Foster families automatically qualify for food stamps and WIC to help with food and formula costs.  It is important that foster families use these programs to prevent financial strain on personal finances.   I will be honest and share that my husband was very uncomfortable accepting food stamps from the government.  However, at one point, we had three foster children in our home and they all needed three meals a day.  So I went down and applied for the assistance.  We both learned that food stamps enabled us to better help the children in our home.  I learned to be proud of the fact that we were a foster family helping children who had already suffered more than any child should.  I found that when more people knew what we did, that more help would often arrive unasked for.  Many people donated clothing, some provided scholarships for extra curricular activities, and some babysat for us.  I did not go around wearing a sign and begging for help.  I just was just honest about the children in our home and the word spread through the community.

I want other families to be able to welcome a foster child into their home and not have to worry about the financial strain .  I hope by sharing my knowledge that I can make another family's foster care journey a little easier.